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{June 1, 2010}   What Stupid Relationship?

What’s a relationship without constant communication. Lately, I’ve been feeling like we don’t have any. Isn’t this the stage where the two of us are supposed to be all mushy gooey and not letting each other rest? But he’s always busy and when he’s not busy he’s tired, and I’m tired of making every meeting seem like an effort. Can’t we just decide to meet for lunch or have an impromptu date? Instead everything has to be planned and it’s taking a lot more effort than I’m prepared to give.

So instead of putting in more effort and getting more understanding, I’ve found myself wondering if he even thinks of me when we don’t see and when he doesn’t call. It’s easy to see he like me well enough when we’re hanging out (and not doing anything naughty in fact) but we’re not giving that time and opportunity for the ‘like’ to turn into anything more.

Most times now, I just say ‘fuck it and fuck boys’ cause I don’t need to be thinking of any stupid arse f*^cker and getting stupid insecurities. Besides, we’re in the same town and it’s like this, how do we cope when I travel?!?! So, fuck it (and see what happens next) or hang on and put in more effort (and see what happens next). Which now?

xoxo
B/S



et cetera